The "E-Species"

stressed up these few days..i will not tell you why because it will not make any difference but i will tell you what makes me feel stressed up..first, i want to apologize in advance because in this post, i might use cursing words like fuck, babi, bodoh, puki, butoh, et cetera..this post speaks on behalf of my heart content..

do you ever feel so stressed up that you feel like crying or bashing the one who make you feel stressed?..i do believe that everyone do experience this kind of stress at least once in their life time..i feel stressed up because something happened on a particular day..the other day actually..it's like this..in my school, i have friends, foes, "plastic" friends, teachers, favorite teachers, "AK" teachers, "AK" friends and et cetera..too many to mention..due to its large number, i categorized these people especially the teacher's population into two species or i suppose it can be called groups..they are called the "E-Species" and the "neutral-species"..only me and LCK know the true meaning of the term..i am going to concentrate on the "E-Species" rather than focusing on the "neutral-species"..back to the topic, these people usually will try their best to "please" me by saying something that i do not like..they thought that by saying that "thing", i would feel happy but it will not make me happy..dammit!..i fuck those who say the word in front of me..fuck it man..i will not tell you what but you would know what it is if you had known me for years..i feel "used" by them..these E-nians do not realize how much i hate them when they say that fucking thing..i can list them for you but i do not think it is such a good idea for me to expose these people..yeah that's right, they "expose" me..i just want to be a low profile one..i just do not want anyone to know about my background whatsoever..i want them to accept me for who i am..not because of that thing..babi la!!!..lancau!..in my school, i noticed that there are 4 teachers in my school that become the "kepala" for this group..3 teachers and a sir..i know that you "care" about me but too much of your attention would lead to "kerimasan"..these 4 teachers have the highest tendency to "expose" me/say that particular thing in front of me/my friends without thinking first..sorry if i offense these teachers but when will you understand the situation?..i gave them lots of hints that i do not like what they did but they just can't see it..RECENTLY, something did happen and it was in front of the whole school..there is this E-nian..this E-nian expose me..i HATE it..really i fucking HATE it..i thought it was going to happen for just a moment but that E-nian drag his speech on this matter a long way..seriously, if i could turn back time, i would..lancau i do not like people to know that thing about me..i just do not like it..maybe because my parents educate me that way (not to be a "hidung tinggi" whatsoever)..after his speech, i can feel that most people at school treat me differently..only some do not..

why i do not like it?..ok suppose you have more money than God (it is just a phrase, do not take it seriously), people would declare themselves as one of your "inner circle" or close related friends..they would kiss your ass and even lick your leftovers shit on your ass cracks without you asking them to do it..the probability for this event to happen is almost equals to 1..ok now the sad part..suppose that imaginary money that you own, disappear completely forever..you have nothing, completely nothing..you only have yourself and your family..for sure, these "talam dua muka" people WILL leave you and WILL not treat you the way they treat you when you own the fucking money..i'm sure this will happen and i can bet my life on it..it goes the same way with my situation..people wouldn't treat me the way they are treating me right now IF that "thing" disappear or ended (the "thing" that i am referring to is not the money that i have/own, but i am referring to that "thing")..everything have its own life span..but i believe that some which only consists a tiny population of these people, would treat me the same way..i mean treat me for who i am even when that thing is not there anymore..i believe that and now i can see/identify who is who..

bottom line, i like people who treat me for who i am..not for that thing..please be more understandable..be in my shoes and you will know how i feel when people do these things to me..hanya Allah dan family aku sahaja yang paham dan tahu..i hope i have clear things out..i feel much lighter now..and sorry if this post would cause such a serious offense to some people..thank you very much for reading this..thank you very much indeed..